My partner is 51 and I’m 40. He has a 30-year managerial career at an upscale Cape Cod hotel with very high pay, and I’m between jobs right now (I usually work retail). He has tons of stocks and bonds and accounts and all that jazz, and I only have a basic bank account. He owns two condos in Fort Lauderdale and a gorgeous BMW convertable, and I own nothing of value. We have a faithful and honest relationship and love one another deeply.

A couple of years ago I had cancer surgery, I have high blood pressure, I’m overweight about 50 pounds, and last month I got Lyme disease from a tick bite on a trip to Disney World. Because of this I have not been able to get health insurance and inexpensive life insurance while living in Florida; but since we are also partial Massachusetts residents (which has good insurance programs) I started looking for insurance recently up here.

Right now we are in heavy credit card debt, and I started to be concerned about what would happen if I died (God forbid), because my partner would get stuck with a huge funeral bill. I also realized that he had no life insurance either. So I asked him what we should do. I told him that I didn’t want him to get stuck with the bill for my funeral because I haven’t been able to contribute much financially to our relationship, and also that I had no clue what to due if (God forbid) something happened to him. I have no access to his accounts and we don’t have wills (I’ve tried to talk to him about that in the past too, with no success).

But he outright refuses to discuss the subject. He says he doesn’t want to talk about it, but I said, “If we don’t talk about it, what will happen if one of us passes?” He just said, “Then I guess it’ll be a big mess,” and he walked away.

I’m about ready to pull my hair out here. Can someone PLEASE give me some useful advice on how to handle this. We’re at an impasse because I will not (i.e. I refuse to) get into a fight with him but at the same time we absolutely cannot ignore this subject. Help!!

Thanks.
[PS.. we have a good relationship otherwise and he is a sweetheart.]
TO BEST F’ING FRIENDS FOREVER:

My partner does not insurance through his hotel. They don’t offer it. He pays for his own insurance. Even if he did get his health insurance from his job, its not the same thing as LIFE insurance. Big difference.
Disney offers domestic partners benefits because the insurance company they chose will do it. Most insurance companies DO NOT cover domestic partners. Why do you think we are fighting so hard for national marriage rights?

Last year I wrote this little rant after I was asked to “Please describe myself in 2-3 sentences” on a job application. My English teacher read it and he said I should use it as my college essay because it says a lot about me as an individual. I am a bit apprehensive because it’s obviously very unconventional. Is it worth the risk, or should I just write a normal essay?

“Please describe yourself in 2-3 sentences.”

1. Hello my name is Sarah and I have brown eyes and I will be 18 on May 14, 2009 and I am a senior at Farmington High School and my favorite subjects are English and history and I am also good at math but sometimes I think it’s boring and I am on the swim team and my favorite strokes are freestyle and breaststroke and I also tap dance in fact last year I became a teaching assistant at my dance studio and I absolutely love it because I get to work with kids who make me laugh a lot and I have considered becoming an elementary school teacher because of that job and I learned to read when I was three years old and I was very shy when I was little but not so much now and I like to write poetry and my favorite poets are Taylor Mali and Billy Collins and I don’t put milk in my cereal because I **** soggy food and my favorite flavor of ice cream is cookie dough which isn’t actually a flavor it’s just vanilla ice cream with chunks of cookie dough mixed in and I believe it is important to make these kids of distinctions and I like to watch the Discovery channel and I am learning to play the piano and so far I can play “Let It Be” and “Hey Jude” and the Beatles are my favorite band but I also love Jack Johnson and I saw him in concert on August 6 in Massachusetts which was unforgettable and I am really good at hide and seek and I have black shoes with white polka dots that don’t match any of my other clothes but I wear them almost every day because I really like them and when I go to Bertucci’s I always fill up on the rolls before my entrée comes and someday I will move to England and pick up an English accent and then I will come back here and make everyone jealous and I love palindromes like “See referees” and I am a voracious reader and one time in third grade I was so engrossed in what I was reading that the whole class left to go to lunch and I didn’t notice until the teacher turned off the lights and I have a brother named Matt who is two years younger but a little bit taller than me and we look exactly alike so sometimes people think we are twins and one time I went camping with my family in Vermont and we saw beavers swimming in a lake and another time I woke up in the middle of the night because I heard a loud noise and I looked outside and there were three raccoons climbing on the bird feeder and they looked so funny I don’t think I will ever forget it and I think musicology is silly and I like to do my biology homework in colored pencil because it makes it more exciting and someday after I learn to drive stick I will buy a tie-dye hippie van and drive it across the country and I think pineapples and coconuts are both disgusting but I love palm trees and the beach and someday I will drive my hippie van to Fort Lauderdale and live there but not in a house because I will go to college and major in something that doesn’t make any money like education or history but that’s OK because I truly believe that there are more important things in life than fancy houses like being honest and voting and going to the Hill-Stead Museum’s annual Sunken Garden Poetry Festival and I am generous and self-centered and logical and absurd and funny and serious and I am a nerd and a hippie and an optimist and a pessimist and a teacher and a student and a dreamer and a doer and an introvert and an extrovert and I resent that this job application thinks two to three sentences is enough space to adequately describe myself but all of this is OK because I am me and all you need is love.

2. I **** run-on sentences.

3. I do, however, like loopholes.

Thanks for reading! Sorry I know it’s long but I really appreciate your feedback.

mine is very bad here in massachusetts..

okay so i want to be a cop for halloween and im trying to find a costume that has short short and zips down the front. i prefer navy blue.
i love this one but its only an online store and i dont have a credit card …

http://www.yandy.com/-Madame-Officer.php

(well except for that stupid donut)
pleaaase help me out

I live in Massachusetts. I was just wondering, I have some deductions that I am claiming this year and I’m not sure if I’m allowed to claim them on both my federal and state returns.

I am deducting for Rent paid (Which I think is a state only deduction) and mileage between jobs for my work. I have done some research and have not seen anything in the federal returns for the rent paid, only in the state returns. However, the mileage I see in both.
- So what do I do? Any help would be great!

URGENT!! THIS IS LONG BUT READ IF YOU CAN GIVE ME ADVICE: HOW TO DEAL WITH DEPRESSION AND BOYFRIENDS PARENTS WHO WONT ACKNOWLEDGE IT…

My boyfriend and I have dated for the last four year, He is 25 now and I am 24. We bought a house in Massachusetts together and have lived together for about 2 1/2 years now. We have 2 dogs and are planning on getting married. We are extremely healthy and practical young adults and we are doing out best to make it independently in this world without having to fail or move back in with our parents. The stress is heavy but our bills are still getting paid and food is always on our table. After over a year of being efficient in living on our own, The past four months my boyfriend has dropped into a stage of being overwhelmed and depressed. He has begun going to see a therapist because he started to lash out on me personally and have these breakdowns where he got really angry and unreasonable. With winter coming he has gotten to the lowest point I have ever seen him. His attitudes are unpredictable and he says some pretty rotten things to me I never thought he’d say. Very manic, very uneven.
His mother is very depressed, his parents have been wanting to divorce for years but his siblings are still teenagers and so they stay together. His family are in no way emotionally efficient. They dont talk about problems, they bottle them all up. He has been going home after work to do odd jobs for his parents every day after work and not coming straight home from work like he used to. He always “stops in” to check on them or to pick something up or drop something off. I understand his need for seeing his family regularly but they don’t help him with his serious depression. He has expressed to me he has suicidal thoughts and they pretend everything is just the same. His dad won’t even acknowledge he is in therapy. HIS FAMILY DOES NOTHING TO HELP HIM.

I have to deal with the manic attitudes, and the depression, and the complaining about the shadows cast over life, while his family gets to not have to face it. I have to bear the brunt of his depression. This has caused a divide divide between his family and I. I feel they aren’t trying to help him out of this rough period. They pretend he isn’t sad and depressed and everything is okay, they pretend not to hear when he comments about therapy or depression.

How do I act around his family. Can I express to his parents how disappointed I am with them at their lack of support for their suffering son, what do I do about being so angry and resentful that I am the only one who has to deal with this depressed man? Where are the boundaries?
Since his family tends to clam up when faced with real issues of importance or of heavy emotion how should I approach this. Is writing a letter to them rude aqnd cold or is is appropriate and descrete? I don’t want to cause more stree for bf by creating and argument between me and them.
CoeyG: The reason it DOES effect me is because he has begun to spend a lot of time around his families home lately. I think he goes there looking forhappiness or support and they pretend like there is no problem then he comes home afterwards and I have to be the only one to see him and deal with him as depressed as he is. They let him pretend nothing is wrong with him and it comes back onto me two fold when he comes home form there…. his disapointment in his family not helping him through this makes it worse!!!

My dad hasn’t had a job in 8 months, and we are ‘supposedly’ moving back to massachusetts (we live in nevada). he talks as if we’re moving at the end of the month, but it never happens! anyway, he has a new “plan” as he calls it….to not pay for the house!!! i’m so worried! if he doesn’t pay the morgage on the house, how long until they kick us out?!?!

the reason that he’s “doing this” is because he bought the house for 300,000 and now it’s worth 100,000 and he owes like 200,000 on it…something like that.

what can i do!!???

i’m only 15, and i don’t have ANY relatives on the west coast!

the left drops this bombshell 5 weeks before the election in an obvious attempt to grab power. they hide the identity of the 21 year old accuser, in the hopes his identity will not be revealed until after the elections, but in an ABC glitch, his identity is revealed, he was 18 at the time of the dreaded instant messages. Now since the dems are the party of mass *** weddings and the like, (as well as DEMOCRATIC congressman Studds of Massachusetts, who had an actual relationship with his 17 year old paige, won re-election and retired 13 years later), what is the dems point with this one? Is he still a child predator when he hits on 18 year olds? or will the dems come up with other smear jobs in order to grab power, in lieu of actually campaigning ideas and solutions instead of smears? and pray to allah that it sticks?

http://www.drudgereport.com/flashmfa.htm

Bailouts for banks and insurance companies.
Federal bailouts and related spending proposed by the Obama Administration now total 8 trillion dollars, according to the American Institute for Economic Research.

To pay for exploding federal spending, Obama’s Congressional allies are mulling huge tax increases. Rep. Jerry McNerney (D-Cal.) wants a 90 percent tax rate. Obama has spent more in his first 50 days, by far, than George Bush spent on the entire Iraq War. That includes a pork-filled $800 billion stimulus package that deceptively repealed welfare reform, and that the Congressional Budget Office admits will cut the size of America’s economy in the long run by exploding the national debt.

The bailouts and new spending will benefit many undeserving people who are well-to-do. The Treasury Department’s recently announced mortgage bailout will bail out irresponsible mortgage borrowers with big homes, high incomes and normal mortgage payments, covering mortgages up to $729,750.

People are suffering across much of the country, but not here in Washington, D.C., where the White House is throwing lavish parties and well-to-do residents are being enriched at taxpayer expense by Obama’s expansion of government. The expected hiring of up to 250,000 new bureaucrats by the Obama Administration is helping to prop up home values in Washington’s inner suburbs, while siphoning money out of less fortunate regions of the country. The bureaucrats’ pay will likely be much better than that of the far-more-numerous private sector employees whose jobs are being lost as a result of Obama’s deficit spending, which will crowd out private investment. Expensive restaurants and sellers of luxury goods in Washington, D.C. still seem to have plenty of business. My spend-thrift liberal neighbors, who have a second mortgage, are spending as conspicuously and prodigiously as ever.

The $800 billion stimulus package also subsidizes groups that helped spawn the mortgage crisis, like ACORN, which promoted “liar loans” and engaged in financial fraud and vote fraud.

An ally of ACORN, the Congressman Barney Frank, (D-Massachusetts) helped spawn the mortgage crisis by blocking needed reforms of the bankrupt government-sponsored mortgage giants, Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac, and backing “affordable housing” mandates that resulted in risky mortgage loans. But now this hypocrite wants a one-sided inquisition into who caused the crisis!

http://www.openmarket.org/2009/03/08/8-trillion-in-bailouts-undeserving-rich-benefit/

My mom told me today that because she’s not getting enough jobs at work (she used to get four jobs a week now she’s only getting one a week and it’s been like that since january) that she’s thinking of moving down to virginia where a friend of hers has a position for her that would mean a lot more work.
My parents are gettingseparatedd so my dad would stay up here in MA. My mom gave me the choice to go with her to Virginia, or stay in Mass. with my dad.
I kind of do want to move to Virginia. It’d be like a whole new beginning and I’ve always wanted to be ablee to sort of re invent myself. I’d be able to start over which is something I’d really like to do.
At the same time I’d really miss my BFFs. I’d probably be able to see them during most of the vacations, including summer (especially since I start driving this December if I’m in Virginia, June if I’m in massachusetts) But I’m still afraid I’d miss them.
Also I’m slightly worried about the move from an academic veiw point. Aren’t schools from the North East better than those from the south (and I don’t mean to insult anyone with that, I’m just asking). A magazine rated my school as second best in MA, would this move affect my chances at getting into a good college? (especially since I had a not-so-great freshmen year)

What do you think I should do? Move or don’t move?

Also do you think I should tell my friends just yet? My mom says, if it does happen, It won’t happen for a little less than a year, I think I should wait until school starts (beginning of Sept.) so I can tell them face to face instead of over the phone or facebook chat, but what do you think?
I found out where in VA, virginia beach.
What are the schools like there?